Someone observed that this is what Tucker Carlson does masterfully.
Dealing with a highly conditioned person.
Avoid triggering resistance responses. Be gentle, compassionate, supportive. You must resolve and release any negative emotions you feel toward the person you’re speaking with.
Don’t be an evangelist or salesperson: don’t present information forcefully, and don’t be too enthusiastic.
The information that people are conditioned to reject is “Santa doesn’t exist” times 1000, so there’s no other way than for them to arrive at conclusions themselves. Many eventually will.
Don’t get into an oppositional dynamic: either offensive or defensive stances prompt the opposite in the other. Instead defy this tendency by resolutely getting and staying in their corner. Don’t tell someone they’re wrong. It is crucial not to be patronizing or belittling in any way.
Don’t use any derogatory language (e.g. “sheep”) for those who aren’t aware of the real issues.
Honor their experience: for example, if they’re afraid, acknowledge the fear, even if we feel it to be unwarranted.
Stay within the story they believe. There are plenty of inconsistencies and other problems within it, and it’s most fruitful to start with those. Until they see a problem with their story, they will feel safest completely rejecting anything (and anyone) that challenges it. Belief trumps facts.
Don’t reference blacklisted names as a source of information. People will lean back and say “aha, I know this one”, reply with whatever they have been trained to say about that name, and feel smug.
Start with concepts and facts that are easiest to accept. People can accept the idea of business corruption far more easily than other well-documented facts about how powerful people conduct themselves.
It’s very easy to overestimate how much our ideas will be understood. Lay out concepts and information in a simple way and do not assume prior knowledge.
Everyone wants to be treated with dignity: 1. their identity accepted. 2. recognition for their unique qualities and way of life. 3. to be acknowledged when something bad happens to them. 4. safety (physical and psychological). 5. to be free from humiliation. 6. to be included. 7. to be understood. 8. to be treated fairly. 9. to be given the benefit of the doubt. 10. to receive an apology when someone does them wrong. When someone fails to treat us with dignity, let them be the only rude one.
Introduce New Ideas With Analogies. Use stories and metaphors, which are the most efficient traditional methods for teaching morals and values.
Separate the person and faulty idea. The person is a friend and the faulty idea is the enemy.
Bypass authority conditioning by using facts quoted by experts and other already trusted information. Be humble and supportive as the realizations start to come—it’s a stressful moment for them. Stay far away from “I told you so”.
Read the room, know your audience, and choose what to discuss appropriately. If you’re speaking more than they are, you’re probably doing it wrong. Also, give space for silence so they can reflect, and know when to stop the conversation or take a break.
When appropriate, ask if they would like suggestions on reading material, or if they want to talk again in the future.